Professor Sharon

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Mom and Alzheimer’s….

July 20th, 2009 · 4 Comments · Musings

“I called to tell you your Aunt Betty has passed.”

“I’m the last of 5 you know.”

“I’m so upset about the news that I get confused.  I’m the last standing of 8 you know.”

“I don’t know why nobody called me.”

“Do you know anything about it?”

“Did you go to the funeral?”

“I’m the last of 5 you know: let’s see Mary, you…”

“I won’t keep you any longer.”

“Do you know if Ma knows?”

“Will you send me the notice in the paper?”

“I’m the last of 5 – I didn’t think I’d outlive them all.”

“I love you. Talk to you later.”

I know Mom.  I  know that you are upset and amazed at outliving twelve brothers and sisters.  I know that you just forgot for a little that your mother died in 1971.  I know that you just forgot momentarily that I was your daughter and not your sister.  I know that you were on a nice vacation in the mountains with your companion and your children didn’t want to call you and upset you on your trip — maybe the last trip you’ll remember until you forget totally.  I know that you love me.  I know it’s not the last time you’ll call me the wrong child.  It’s okay — I know Mom  — it’s okay.  (It’s really not okay, is it Mom?  But that’s life.)

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4 Comments so far ↓

  • ProfSharon

    I appreciate the comments. Suzanne, you’ve especially captured the reality of it erasing life…there are more and more moments when I realize how often I would say to Mom: “remember when….?”

  • Suzanne

    That was beautifully written and incredibly touching. The loss of a loved one is always difficult, but there’s something especially cruel about the slow-motion loss of Alzheimer’s erasing your life before you pass.

  • SerahRose

    I’m sorry, mom. Sometimes the best you can do is good enough. And you’re doing your best.

  • Pat

    Put’s it all in perspective. doesnt it? 🙁

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